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Harry Potter: The cocksucking champ
By pirate sprite
One day Harrison Potter was walking through the halls of cockhogs when he was approached by his cherished friend and reliable fuckpartner Ron, Ron was ecstatic and engulfed in panic, for he was baring terrible news
"Harry Harry!" Ron Exclaimed, "The children in these walls have bee doubting you, they've argued that there is one who is better at sucking cocks than even you! They say the man calls himself Malfag, and he's quite the formidable cocksucker, they say he can suck 8 horse dicks at the same time! I'd be nervous if I were you."
"Malfag?" Harry said "Why his cocksucking skills are not worthy to wipe my ass with I say! No one will ever best me in sucking cocks, no one!"
Harry was overcame with fear when he was approached by his rival wizard Malfag, Malfag the smug little shit approached Harry
"Harry Potter?" Malfag said, "My father has told me about you, he said you can suck a nice cock, he says you're a real pro at it, you use tongue patterns that rival professional cocksuckers. But I can't be quite sure that I believe him"
"What makes you say that!?" Harry exclaimed, his cocksucking skills were well known, never before had he encountered criticism of his talents in his entire life.
"Harry, how many cocks can you suck in a row?" Malfag said.
"One time I sucked six in a row" Harry said
"Six? Six in a row? My my, that is quite the charitable amount. I respect that, however, I must bring to the table that last family reunion, I sucked 10 dirty dicks in a row." Malfag exclaimed.
"That's a lie!" Harry said
"Don't bet on that Harry, my father is a cherished and famous cocksucker, I've been practicing my whole life, hoping to carry on the family name, I've practiced with a range of items, from my mother's enlarged clitoris to cucumbers to even watermelons! Have you ever seen a lad suck off an entire watermelon? Quite a breathtaking sight I must say." Malfag said, Harry wondered whether he was more full of himself than semen, but for his sake he hoped it was the former.
"Your skills are very apparent and you are obviously a very powerful cock wizard. But I'd be willing to bet the farm that you cannot best me in a cock suck-off, in fact, what say you we settle this like real men? A test of skill, we determine who can suck more cocks than the other on the field, we'll have a cocksucking field day, if you will."
"You're on Harry Potter," Malfag smiled, "May the best cocksucker win."
The day of skill had arrived, and Harry was determined to win. He was sure that he would best him in this contest of cocksuck, even if it meant sucking enough cock to drown himself.
"Would the contestants please report to the cocksucking zone to prepare for the contest." Archmage N****rfuck said, his voice boomed in such power and command that made the spectators cocks contort and tremble in fear.
The age old rules of a cocksucking contest at Cockhogs came into play. Whomever can suck off the most objects in the allotted time would win. The guns went off and the contestants rushed the table. They started small, eggs, pears, each others penises, they were pacing themselves.
"Harry I would definitely not want to waste your time, so I'm ending this early." With that Malfag sucked down a whole watermelon in 3 seconds flat, Harries jaw dropped in sight of this breathtaking act.
"Harry! Blow the watermelon! I believe in you!" Ron was cheering him on in the stands, Harry remembered Ron's sweet asshole, and knowing that Ron won't put out for losers, Harry sucked down a watermelon. The Crowds erupted with cheer.
"We have a tie, however, the sacred rules of the cocksuck off proclaim that only one cocksucker may be crowned king cocksucker, so a tiebreaker must be decided"
"And I have a perfect one," N****rfuck said, "Boys, are you ready to take on, the ten ton train!?" With that N****rfuck ripped off his robe, and with that his magnificent black cock was revealed. What must have been at least 12 feet in length, N****rfuck commanded a dick huge enough to pose a challenge for Harry and Malfag.
"It's too big!" Malfag said, "I've brought shame to my family with my forfeit, and with that I must commit the ultimate sacrifice." With that Malfag revealed the only stick he had not yet sucked besides N****rfuck's, a 12 gauge shot gun. With that he blew his brains out on the field of honor and sacrifice.
"Harry, it looks like you have won by default, however, to be crowned true dicksuck champion, you must suck my cock and swallow my cum." N****rfuck said.
"I think, I can, I think, I can, I think, I can..." Harry mumbled as he dove on N****rfuck's dick, and soon he had made him cum and gulped down his semen.
"Harry is the new cocksuck champion!" N****rfuck exclaimed as he lit up a cigarette. The crowd erupted in cheer.
"I knew you could do it Harry!" Ron exclaimed.
"Thanks Ron, I was thinking, now that I'm Cocksuck champion, I could "let you hold the reigns", and let us throw a cock party in your mouth, and I mean all of us." Harry grinned.
"I don't know what to say," Ron gasped.
"That's the funny thing about rape," Harry said "you don't have to say a thing."
THIS IS A FLASH SERIES ABOUT FRANKLIN THE TURTLE.
ITS COMING SOON
Oh boy recognition. Even if it's from a total faggot, it's always nice.
I recentley stumbled upon the worst goddamn flash series in my life, it honestly tops Ackbar in terms of sheer dogshit, the writing is horrible, the characters ared 2d and bland, and its simply bad. I sent him a friendly hate letter. Thats not uncommon on newgrounds right? You dont like something you express it. This guy doesnt ask why I didnt like his movies, he just calls me, and I quote "You suck and will never make front page. Thank you for continuing to suck donkey dick.". Well, how rude is this? I respond to him exactly why I hate his flash movies, he ignores this and replies
"You know what? I didn't even read any of the bullshit you just said. If you suck so bad at animating then don't take your anger out on me. You think I only animate sprites? You're ignorant and retarded. Go back to doing your mediocre clock pieces of shit movies."
You know what? I didn't even read any of the bullshit you just said.
You're ignorant and retarded.
Well isnt the pot calling the kettle black my good friend.
Since I have enough self respect to defend myself when it is needed, I will do so now
::This is the latest hate mail I've gotten on
LATEST? More like Only you fucking failiure. Noone has the balls to speak up against your shit, Im sure your inbox is just "OMG I LOVE YOU KILIT SAN!!!! ^____^ KEKEKE"
::Newgrounds by some mediocre flash animator.
Although Im not particularly proud of my star boy movies, this is quite honestly the most hippocrital thing ive heard all day. You suck BALLS at flash. There I said it. Meatwad Sprite has more talent than this guy. I wont argue that you think I'm a MEDIOCRE flash animator, which I'm not, I am making drawn movies that are very fbf'd in the coming weeks which I guarentee will make you hard, but honestly, look at your own movies. Gaia Sprites being tweened sure are amazing right guys?
::He's obviously jealous cause I made daily 5th and frontpage on Newgrounds for a few days.
This is just my favorite part. Front page doesnt mean shit, a mod saw your movie would get page views from the weabooo population of newgrounds. WHoopdie-fuckin-doo. The Daily fith is the same thing, except a few 12 year olds from gaia liked your movie. Once again, Whoopdie-fuckin-doo.
::It's not my fault he sticks with shitty clock movies and only has like 3 friends who reviews them.
Its not my fault you have no friends and a few 12 year olds who vote five on your shit. Dipshit
::You are fucking horrible at flash dont ever touch the goddamn program again.
::Love, your pal,
Hey that guys smart
::He sent me a 2nd one but I didn't bother reading his retarded rants. I believe his reasons for hating my flash movies are:
IDIOT, IGNORE AND SHUN CONSTRUCTIVE CRITISIM SO THAT YOUR FANS SEE THE BIG BAD PIRATE SPRITE HUH. YOU'RE SO FUCKING COOL I WANT YOUR DICK RIGHT NOW
::1. He sucks at animating
Not really. What you've seen, yes, it sucks. Oh boy
::2. He can't get frontpage for his material.
Because my movies are just ripped from the front page right, By the way I loved your Final Fantasy movies they were SO ORIGINAL AND NEVER DONE BEFORE
::3. He hates anime and is ignorant.
Do I hate ALL anime? No, really I enjoy Some anime, for example, I am really looking forward to No more heroes. That's anime, thats good, it has a unique style. What are your movies? THE SAME EXACT FORM OF ANIME DONE OVER AND OVER AND OVER
::4. He's just trying to start shit with other animators.
WHAT? Have you seen ANY other animator besides you even mention me? EVER? No. I just wanted to tell you that I hate your movies and why. Idiot
::5. Clock crew has always sucked on NG and everyone knows it.
Thems fightan words mother fucker
::6. No one watches his movies
If I made my first few movies for this, they wouldnt look like they do now. Have you considered that maybe I make them to entertain my friends and NOT get tons of views and E-penis points unlike yourself? That entertaining my friends and family is more important than that?
::7. No one reviews his movies except his friends.
Thats cool I dont mind. Their reviews are alot better than the ones you get mr "KEKEKE KAWAII GAIA ONLINE MOVIE ROX"
::8. He has no life but to troll around Newgrounds.
I Love newgrounds. Honestly, I really love this website and would only like to see it go further. If you look at my other PM I gave you constructive critisim underneath the anger, but you didnt look at that since you just wanted to make a HATE MAIL LOL THIS IS FUNNY blog post to get your fans to hate me. Who sounds like the troll now?
::9. He thinks all I animate are sprites and have no idea what I'm capable of.
my name is pirateSPRITE. I like sprites you dumb piece of shit
:: (I don't post all my stuff on the web).
::10. He hates sprite movies but he can't animate or edit any kind of sprite, especially ones from Gaia.
Oh animating Gaia Sprites are just SO HARD TO USE, I really feel for the blood and tears it took you to show us your fantastic movies.
::Having that said, I'm out. Thanks for everyone elses' support
Aka: THANKS FOR BLINDLY SUCKING MY COCK EVERYWHERE ELSE FANBOYS/FANGIRLS
::since Gaia Adventures is the 'only' and I repeat... 'only'
Kindly fuck off forever Klik, you fucking failiure
Edit: Beyond this news post I'm fucking done with you you self absorbed prick. I'm not going to start a internet drama pingpong match with you just because you took a hate letter far enough to publicly try to make me look stupid. Go ahead and tell all your circle jerkers how jealous I am of you, really, I dont care anymore.
Summer's over, fuck, but Back to flash now.
I've joined a Crew which I belive has some potential, the Handosme men. ( http://z11.invisionfree.com/The_Handso me_Men/index.php? ), which Im doing the forum artwork for. Currently we've started a collab to get the word out. I'm also working on a skit movie type thing, That's going to be badass. I've also had some other ideas I've been thinking about, but I havent thought enough about them to say anything.
Expect some releases by me some time next week, dont expect constant releases since I'm in school again.
Also theese kids are awesome
Fuck you you pencil dicked mother fucker go climb a wall of dicks
sketched in >3 minutes
NEW ACCOUNT: http://Thenosebleedclown.newgrounds.co m
NOT FINISHED BUT NEVER WILL BE